3.8.11

5 years of self (absorbed) portraits

 
First post of the month! This means I'm going to take liberties with the content this week...

I think my generation might be the first to experience a certain phenomenon.

I think I was 13 when I got my first digital camera, and I was amazed that I could take pictures indoors and upload them right onto the computer. I always took a lot of pictures, but after going digital my picture taking increased exponentially.

I also remember when social media sites became popular. My hometown, Edmonton, seems to have been the nebula of these new creations because there were several sites unique to the town that emerged before the likes of myspace and facebook. I mention these sites because they gave young kids like me a place to make my own and to use to create an identity that I could share with the world.

These two things, which emerged around the same time led to the birth of a pretty unique and new genre of photography: the "myspace" style of self portrait.

Now that I'm older I don't obsess so much over my profile picture, and I take my camera everywhere so there's no shortage of photos to use. Consequently, I've also made the switch back to 35mm, although I still take my D70 and T2i out for photos sometimes.

The point, you ask? Well, I have a collection on my computer of pictures I've taken of myself since 2006, which in a way is a real testament to the digital age. I will always have this record of the different people I've been.

It's amazing how much can change in a year.

2006

In 2006, I worked a clothing store, and then at a jewellery store. My hair was blue, orange, and then purple. I was treated badly in love. Later I dated a nice boy named Hugh and I didn't treat him well. I did a lot of bad and didn't take care of myself but I learned a lot.

2007

In 2007 I graduated from high school and worked at a coffee shop. I started dating a crust punk who became a rudeboy who became a skinhead. My hair was orange, then blonde, and then purple. I took pictures of myself outside. I was selfish and happy.

2008

In the first half of 2008 I had purple hair, then orange hair, then brown hair, then no hair! When some of it grew back I dyed it pink. I was very confident and very in love. I knew who I was and was excited to go to university and start my life in ernest.


When I moved to Vancouver I lost all that confidence. I didn't have any friends and suddenly I didn't know who I was any more. I smoked a lot of pot. Since I didn't like who I was I started to destroy the life I had so that something better could grow out of it, but this led me to some poor choices. My hair was blonde and I stopped drawing.

2009

In 2009 I moved into an apartment with a girl I had become close to at university. I felt lonely all the time but I was starting to find ways to deal with it. I started taking pictures of graffiti and walking all over looking for it. I started wearing less makeup and I let my natural hair colour take over. I drank a lot.

2010

In 2010 I started really believing I could make a living in film, and I started taking my photography more and more seriously. I grew close to a man who became my best friend and then my partner. He helped me learn a lot about myself. I started playing piano & bass for the first time in years.

2011

 I'm 21 and I think I'm getting starting to come out of my shell again. I know who my friends are and while I'm still learning how to be the person I want to be, I look back to when I was 16 and remember what a little asshole I was and I'm glad that's not who I am any more.

I'm one of many, many kids who took pictures of themselves every week, every month, for years, and I find it interesting how many things I captured that I didn't intend to. Photography continues to surprise me every day with what it can accomplish, like this... a diary, of sorts.

Thanks for reading! The less personal posts will resume next week.
xoxoxo

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